Late October Update
Oct. 21st, 2021 01:37 pmHaven't blogged in a while, but I wanted to come back here since other social media is stressing me out to no end! Being someone who cares about psychology stinks when you keep wanting to psychoanalyze people..ahaha...
As for life things? I got laid off from my job because of supposedly a "lack of compatibility" with my old position and was told I wasn't skilled enough. That's why I took an entry level minimum wage job in the first place! This is what I can't stand about the modern workforce; every employer wants you to have all the skills they look for already and train you as little as possible. Most of the negative feedback I got was about my communication skills anyways. Sucks when you get punished for something you've always been told you'll NEVER be good at. At least I was able to get two extra weeks of work and secure a final paycheck. I started looking for more jobs in the area and at least one called me back, so there's that. I really need a job and/or some sort of routine to feel like a human being, turns out. What I liked about work is that I was optimistic the entire time I was there and happy with my performance, unlike how I am at home. I almost had a meltdown over social media a few days ago, for corn's sake!
Speaking of money, HALLOWEEN! October kind of crept by me because of work, but now I have time to buy candy, do things, etc. Too bad I'm not the type to get invited to parties. I've been looking for an excuse to wear my Lilia Vanrouge costume I bought last year, but with a mask on no one will see my vampire teeth. :( But I am the type who loves candy corn and other Halloween candy lines, so it's a bit of a fun time out here. I like the colder weather too.
I attempted to draw something in my sketchbook for every day of October, which was fun until the ideas started drying up. I promised myself I would use up my watercolors this year, but I haven't done ANYthing with them. Still, colored pencil only drawings are pretty fun.
Miscellaneous stuff, I got Animal Crossing for the switch two months ago for my birthday and I've really been enjoying it. Making bells is hard so there aren't a lot of items on my island yet, but I like the natural feel of the forests and flowers anyways. Having an island covered in stuff so you can barely move is not for me, I would feel boxed in and I hate feeling that way in a video game. I DID do a spooky Halloween island tour during September because I signed up for Nintendo Online, and I loved it! Lots of beautiful ideas and some non-spooky ones I want to incorporate into my island.
I also got into Minecraft again. I've never actually had a longterm single player server there, I like progress more when it's tied to a multiplayer server with my friends. But those require consistent upkeep to stay online, which causes some problems in the end. Building bridges and terraforming is my forte; not really into making buildings.
Yume100 (https://yume100prince.fandom.com/) has been one of my comfort games for a long time, and I got into it again right around the time I lost my job. The UI is clunky as hell but it has some of the best anime boys ever created. It is a VERY grindy game, so I always have to set aside time to play.
I've never had a good work/life balance and it SUCKS. I keep wanting to do for-fun projects but they often don't go anywhere. Not much progress on Youtube videos either. I'm tired of making art for every single video sometimes but I also feel I have to since I'm an artist. :( Sigh....If I could get over my guilt in making "lazy" videos I could do so much.
If I could get over my relationship guilt, that'd be fun too. I tried dating apps, but that proved to be a mistake. Lots of these guys want to meet me immediately and I'm just SO scared I won't be able to make it or something bad will happen. At least I made some friends in my area. I like going out and meeting locals but it seems so hard to make actual friends. Still, I live in one of the most populated states, so it can't be THAT hard. Having only online friends isn't good for the soul.
Since I haven't been on here for a while, again, much thanks to starwatcher for a swift donation a couple months ago.![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
starwatcher: https://starwatcher.dreamwidth.org I didn't use the money yet, But it'll probably go towards therapy or something helpful like that. As little as I really want to be active in fandom spaces, sometimes it's worth it.
As for life things? I got laid off from my job because of supposedly a "lack of compatibility" with my old position and was told I wasn't skilled enough. That's why I took an entry level minimum wage job in the first place! This is what I can't stand about the modern workforce; every employer wants you to have all the skills they look for already and train you as little as possible. Most of the negative feedback I got was about my communication skills anyways. Sucks when you get punished for something you've always been told you'll NEVER be good at. At least I was able to get two extra weeks of work and secure a final paycheck. I started looking for more jobs in the area and at least one called me back, so there's that. I really need a job and/or some sort of routine to feel like a human being, turns out. What I liked about work is that I was optimistic the entire time I was there and happy with my performance, unlike how I am at home. I almost had a meltdown over social media a few days ago, for corn's sake!
Speaking of money, HALLOWEEN! October kind of crept by me because of work, but now I have time to buy candy, do things, etc. Too bad I'm not the type to get invited to parties. I've been looking for an excuse to wear my Lilia Vanrouge costume I bought last year, but with a mask on no one will see my vampire teeth. :( But I am the type who loves candy corn and other Halloween candy lines, so it's a bit of a fun time out here. I like the colder weather too.
I attempted to draw something in my sketchbook for every day of October, which was fun until the ideas started drying up. I promised myself I would use up my watercolors this year, but I haven't done ANYthing with them. Still, colored pencil only drawings are pretty fun.
Miscellaneous stuff, I got Animal Crossing for the switch two months ago for my birthday and I've really been enjoying it. Making bells is hard so there aren't a lot of items on my island yet, but I like the natural feel of the forests and flowers anyways. Having an island covered in stuff so you can barely move is not for me, I would feel boxed in and I hate feeling that way in a video game. I DID do a spooky Halloween island tour during September because I signed up for Nintendo Online, and I loved it! Lots of beautiful ideas and some non-spooky ones I want to incorporate into my island.
I also got into Minecraft again. I've never actually had a longterm single player server there, I like progress more when it's tied to a multiplayer server with my friends. But those require consistent upkeep to stay online, which causes some problems in the end. Building bridges and terraforming is my forte; not really into making buildings.
Yume100 (https://yume100prince.fandom.com/) has been one of my comfort games for a long time, and I got into it again right around the time I lost my job. The UI is clunky as hell but it has some of the best anime boys ever created. It is a VERY grindy game, so I always have to set aside time to play.
I've never had a good work/life balance and it SUCKS. I keep wanting to do for-fun projects but they often don't go anywhere. Not much progress on Youtube videos either. I'm tired of making art for every single video sometimes but I also feel I have to since I'm an artist. :( Sigh....If I could get over my guilt in making "lazy" videos I could do so much.
If I could get over my relationship guilt, that'd be fun too. I tried dating apps, but that proved to be a mistake. Lots of these guys want to meet me immediately and I'm just SO scared I won't be able to make it or something bad will happen. At least I made some friends in my area. I like going out and meeting locals but it seems so hard to make actual friends. Still, I live in one of the most populated states, so it can't be THAT hard. Having only online friends isn't good for the soul.
Since I haven't been on here for a while, again, much thanks to starwatcher for a swift donation a couple months ago.
starwatcher: https://starwatcher.dreamwidth.org I didn't use the money yet, But it'll probably go towards therapy or something helpful like that. As little as I really want to be active in fandom spaces, sometimes it's worth it.
